Do you ever have a thought that won't leave, kind of like when you can't get a song out of your head? I get that all the time, it will keep me up at night, get me angry or frustrated, even nag at me into the next day. Well, one such thought is on bullying. I have been reading articles on bullying, but not the type you think, because the thought bothers me.
As a society we concentrate on bullying in our schools, which we should. Although, we tend to overlook when that same bully has graduated high school. By then, that person is just a jerk or any other number of names we can think of to call them. Let me back up.
My oldest has been bullied in three different schools, in three different states, and not all by students. Teachers and administrators have had a hand in it too. We focus on school yard bullying, but my question is where did they learn this behavior is okay? Most behaviors that kids display are learned, whether they are found acceptable or never corrected or even from mimicking what they see. If it's okay at home it should be ok everywhere.
Bullies don't just stop being bullies because they graduated or hit adulthood. They just get better at it. According to Forbes, researchers looked at the responses of 2,283 people, and the results surprised even Maxfield: “96% of respondents say they have experienced workplace bullying.” “89% of those bullies have been at it for more than a year.” “54% have been bullying for more than five years.” “80% of bullies affect five or more people.”
Adults who bully constantly demeans others or say snide remarks about others, constantly yelling at others or criticizing others, deliberately isolates someone in social or work situations, and constantly making helpful “suggestions” and laying guilt trips, if their suggestions aren't taken.
According to http://catherinescareercorner.com/2014/04/04/infographic-deal-bully-work/
Here are steps to deal with a bully at work
1. First assess the situation. When it comes to feeling bullied, you have to trust your instincts. If you feel bullied, then, you are probably a victim of bullying.
2. Don’t ignore the situation. Ignoring the situation will not make it go away. Evaluate the situation carefully and confide in someone you trust so that they are aware and can look out for you. If the situation persists, escalate by discussing with a trusted manager, colleagues, mentor or anyone closest to you at work.
3. Document the bully’s actions. Any time you experience a bullying behavior, document the date, time, the name of person(s) present and details of the incident. Note names down if other employees witnessed the incident. Keep a log of every little thing – insults, curses, what’s said, how it’s said and any other back stabbing moves made.
Eventually you will need the documentation of the bully’s impact on you and the business results give the HR information to work with on your behalf.
4. Don’t play their game. An African proverb says, “If a donkey kicks you and you kick back, you are both donkeys!” It’s easy to let someone push your buttons and for you to fly off the handle at them. Ensure that this doesn’t happen. You really don’t want to stoop to a bully’s level. Don’t be baited for any reasons.
5. Set limits and confront the bully. This is an important part of how to deal with a bully at work. Never let a bully escalate their bullying. Shouting counter insults or screaming back at the bully at work might end up getting you in trouble or making the situation worse.
6. Put the bully on blast and inform trusted senior authorities. If after you have confronted the bully you haven’t noticed a change, then, it is time for this next step on how to deal with a bully at work. With your documented log of bellying events, take the issue to your manager (assuming he/she is not the bully), the upper management and your Human Resources Manager and be sure to address the issue from a work perspective.
7. Know when to have another plan. Once you’ve done the things outlined in the Infographic regarding how to deal with a bully at work, and asked for help and nothing changes, you may need to consider the possibility of leaving or changing departments if you work in a big organization. It is important that you think of yourself first. Don’t stay in a negative environment just to prove a point.
More often than not, the bully remains at the workplace and the victim leaves. Speaking out is the only way to stop this type of bullying. If we don't condone bullying in kids why do we continue to allow it in adults? One negative person can affect an entire office, chase off customers, and cost US companies hundreds of thousands of dollars each year. It's time to put a stop to bullying all together.
As a society we concentrate on bullying in our schools, which we should. Although, we tend to overlook when that same bully has graduated high school. By then, that person is just a jerk or any other number of names we can think of to call them. Let me back up.
My oldest has been bullied in three different schools, in three different states, and not all by students. Teachers and administrators have had a hand in it too. We focus on school yard bullying, but my question is where did they learn this behavior is okay? Most behaviors that kids display are learned, whether they are found acceptable or never corrected or even from mimicking what they see. If it's okay at home it should be ok everywhere.
Bullies don't just stop being bullies because they graduated or hit adulthood. They just get better at it. According to Forbes, researchers looked at the responses of 2,283 people, and the results surprised even Maxfield: “96% of respondents say they have experienced workplace bullying.” “89% of those bullies have been at it for more than a year.” “54% have been bullying for more than five years.” “80% of bullies affect five or more people.”
Adults who bully constantly demeans others or say snide remarks about others, constantly yelling at others or criticizing others, deliberately isolates someone in social or work situations, and constantly making helpful “suggestions” and laying guilt trips, if their suggestions aren't taken.
According to http://catherinescareercorner.com/2014/04/04/infographic-deal-bully-work/
Here are steps to deal with a bully at work
1. First assess the situation. When it comes to feeling bullied, you have to trust your instincts. If you feel bullied, then, you are probably a victim of bullying.
2. Don’t ignore the situation. Ignoring the situation will not make it go away. Evaluate the situation carefully and confide in someone you trust so that they are aware and can look out for you. If the situation persists, escalate by discussing with a trusted manager, colleagues, mentor or anyone closest to you at work.
3. Document the bully’s actions. Any time you experience a bullying behavior, document the date, time, the name of person(s) present and details of the incident. Note names down if other employees witnessed the incident. Keep a log of every little thing – insults, curses, what’s said, how it’s said and any other back stabbing moves made.
Eventually you will need the documentation of the bully’s impact on you and the business results give the HR information to work with on your behalf.
4. Don’t play their game. An African proverb says, “If a donkey kicks you and you kick back, you are both donkeys!” It’s easy to let someone push your buttons and for you to fly off the handle at them. Ensure that this doesn’t happen. You really don’t want to stoop to a bully’s level. Don’t be baited for any reasons.
5. Set limits and confront the bully. This is an important part of how to deal with a bully at work. Never let a bully escalate their bullying. Shouting counter insults or screaming back at the bully at work might end up getting you in trouble or making the situation worse.
6. Put the bully on blast and inform trusted senior authorities. If after you have confronted the bully you haven’t noticed a change, then, it is time for this next step on how to deal with a bully at work. With your documented log of bellying events, take the issue to your manager (assuming he/she is not the bully), the upper management and your Human Resources Manager and be sure to address the issue from a work perspective.
7. Know when to have another plan. Once you’ve done the things outlined in the Infographic regarding how to deal with a bully at work, and asked for help and nothing changes, you may need to consider the possibility of leaving or changing departments if you work in a big organization. It is important that you think of yourself first. Don’t stay in a negative environment just to prove a point.
More often than not, the bully remains at the workplace and the victim leaves. Speaking out is the only way to stop this type of bullying. If we don't condone bullying in kids why do we continue to allow it in adults? One negative person can affect an entire office, chase off customers, and cost US companies hundreds of thousands of dollars each year. It's time to put a stop to bullying all together.
Comments
Post a Comment